You gotta open those locked doors...yes, find the keys!

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Everywhere and Everything

When I smell the scent of a flower,
I want your face to appear out of nowhere;
When I climb a tall tower,
I want to see you waiting there out of care.

When I have succumbed to darkness,
I want to see you hold the light;
When I am losing myself in happiness,
I want you to relish that height.

When I am feeling loveless,
I want you to tell me: "You're a Goddess."

                                                                     -Kriti Malhotra

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Why should most love songs be thrown into space?

Many people love listening to love songs. They enjoy the gush of memories and the overflow of feelings that visit them when their favorite love song plays. However, if one does away with the stirring music and the seemingly beautiful lyrics, one will find that these songs defy the definition of true love.

“Main hoon hero tera” by Salman Khan is a love-song in which a male tells a female that he is her hero. A hero is someone who rescues the lady, protects her and even leads her. It is similar to the knight in the shining armor. This is extremely sexist. Why should a woman not be able to do the three functions by herself? Is true love only about rescuing, protecting and leading the lady?

In a song called “Hello” by Adele, she apologizes to her ex-lover. The lover, however, does not respond. It is an extremely melancholic song in sepia. Adele is not able to reconcile with the fact that the relationship has not worked out due to xyz reason and it is only full of regrets. Who ever said that regretting is a good thing? Who ever said that one should sing songs on regrets?

 “Maula Mere Maula” by Anwar is a song in which the singer is going gaga over the appearance of the girl who has smitten him. He talks about her eyes and her hair. Whosoever wrote the song has given a definite boost to the cosmetic industry! Looks matter, you see!

I hope that the aliens come on Earth with their own love-songs because the love-songs here are going to leave them aghast. I also hope that somebody throws all the tapes and records of these songs into the space where no one will ever be able to find them. If they are thrown on the Earth, one will have to manage them, so throw them into the space!


                                                                                                                                     -Kriti Malhotra

Saturday, December 2, 2017

How to Increase your Self-confidence?

    One of the most important aspects of your personality is your self-confidence. It determines your behavior in the social, personal and professional fields. It makes you happy and an optimist even; it is the immunity cells of your body that prevents you from being eaten up by tough times; it belongs to you completely.
    As you swim from the deep and dark waters of diffidence to the surface and light waters of confidence, you may lose your way. The journey is slow but the change is irreversible. Here are some ways to help you in your journey:

1. Try something different: The moment you try something you have never tried before, "I can't" becomes "I can." Thus, you will realize that you can do a lot more than you thought you could. Your confidence and trust in your abilities will increase. This can also be called stepping out of your comfort zone.

2. Do what scares you!: It is rightfully believed that the maximum growth happens when you do what you are afraid of. Trying to do something that you are afraid of can be challenging for the first time with the mental barriers. However, once overcome, you will realize that the fear was a mirage; you believed in a mirage.

3. Keep a diary: Keep a diary on your bedstead or under your pillow and before sleeping write down two things that are good about you. Do this for at least ten days and notice the magical change in you!

4. Talk about them: If you have accomplished something, talk about it to people. It is a good thing to feel proud of yourself. However, there is a fine line that separated talking confidently and boasting; between self-pride and arrogance!

5. The right people: In life, it is absolutely essential to be around people who appreciate the good in you and accept you (flaws and all) ; people who encourage you to become a better person.

Your journey will not be without the lows when you feel that you are falling off a trench. However, keep trying because self-confidence is a precious, good thing!

                                                                                                                 -Kriti Malhotra
    

Monday, November 27, 2017

Shall we replace 'wedding' with the word 'consumerism'?

In India, weddings have always required the host to spend a huge amount of money. There are various reasons for this: it is considered to be the most important day in the life of their child; "what will the society think?"; "this is how it is done;" prestige?

However, the change has been enormous and drastic in the past few years. Earlier, the entire family huddled in one house like a litter of puppies and today they occupy hotel rooms individually. Consequently, the time spent with the extended family members is counted. Relatives are now accustomed to huge spaces with a lot of decoration and a vast variety of food. A lot of this food gets wasted. 

Perhaps, the Indians are missing a piece from the puzzle. They believe that they have all the pieces of the puzzle in place but they are missing a huge piece. What is that? Why are weddings becoming more and more elaborate?

The fashion industry knows that the people are willing to spend a lot of money on the wedding clothes. Lehengas, suits and sarees! Women have a weakness for such beautifully made garments. It is a good thing to adorn yourself beautifully. However, one should be aware of the splurging. If one of the ladies of the group splurges, the other women get an inferiority complex and wish to splurge too. According their theory, their looking good is directly proportional to the cost of the garment. Is there not an excess of emphasis on external appearances? 

This leads me to make-up. Fair is beautiful and make up should change the way one looks. The money spent on make-up has increased sharply. I wonder whether it is because women are insecure about their appearances or they are just too fond of make-up! Is media not  to be blamed for making women dissatisfied with their bodies? They earn greatly in this process.

Blah!Blah! Blah! They same goes for the wedding cards, jewellery and one should not miss the wedding planners. First, people make weddings an astronomical task and then they spend more to reduce the burden of the task.

The name 'wedding' should be replaced by the phrase 'sky-high consumerism day'!


                                                                                                                      -Kriti Malhotra


Sunday, October 1, 2017

Chanel N°5

The word ‘meraki’ is a Greek word which means to put ‘something of yourself’ (1) into what you are doing. For cert, Gabrielle Coco Chanel put a fragrance of her soul into the scent. Consequently, Chanel N°5 became the world’s most famous fragrance.

The fragrance was designed in 1920 by a Russian French perfumer Ernest Beaux. He had asked Chanel’s suggestion for naming the fragrance. She replied: “I always launch my collection on the fifth day of the fifth months, so the number 5 seems to bring me luck--therefore, I will name it N°5.”(2)

It is a combination of different fragrances that form a very subtle concoction. As you breathe it in, its notes change. The ingredients include jasmine, iris, sandalwood and rose. There is a hint of these and other ingredients that combine to form this elixir.

The case has Coco Chanel’s signature colors: black and golden. It is squarish-rectangular bottle. There is a golden band where the cap and the bottle meet. The top of the bottle is embellished with the interlocking CC symbol. All this is enveloped in a slight shine.

The fragrance was used by Marilyn Monroe. It is said that she would wear it in the night. On April, 1952, she was asked “what do you wear to bed?” Her answer was Chanel N°5 “because it’s the...truth”. (3)

This fragrance reminds me of Chanel, the woman who revolutionized the world of women’s fashion and  the woman who said: “The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.” She was truly a gift to this world who shared with this world her gift, her meraki: Chanel N°5.
                                                                                                                              -Kriti Malhotra
References:
(1) http://darlingmagazine.org/in-other-words-meraki/
(2) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ernest_Beaux
(3) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo8UtWiYiZI




Sunday, September 17, 2017

Celebrating Hindi

After going through a lot of struggle, the language ‘Hindi’ written in Devanagiri script managed to be  an official language of the country, India, in 1950. It is one of the most widely spoken languages of the country. Hindi consists of a lot of words of other languages such as Punjabi, Urdu and Sanskrit. The word ‘Hindi’ is actually the Urdu form of the word ‘Hind’ which means India according to Google. Even the name hindi signifies it’s inter-linguistic nature!

A lot of literature such as stories, poems, newspapers and movies have been written in this language. Some plays such Aadhe-Adhure have been translated to other languages such as English (Halfway House). There are specialized language courses both at the level of school and higher education.

Often, hindi words are absorbed in other languages. For instance, the song ‘Jai Ho’ by A.R. Rahman became so popular that the term ‘Jai Ho’ became a part of the Oxford English Dictionary. In the recent years, the mix of hindi and English language has developed and is called Hinglish.

Unfortunately, because of the connection that English has with the so-called ‘elite class’, hindi is considered to be an inferior language most of the time. Every language is spoken by some or the other person; is a medium of expression and communication and hence, cannot be really looked down upon.

With the rapid globalization, hindi is a language that has been taken to foreign lands. Often, Bollywood movies that are in hindi are translated for viewership of foreign countries. Bollywood hindi songs such as ‘Mera Joota hain Japani’ have been very popular among the Russians.

Hindi is the mother-tongue of many Indians and seems to be dying away because of the importance given to languages such as Spanish, French, German and English. What will happen to the language ultimately? Will there be further expansion of the language that will include words of the other foreign languages like Japanese can only be revealed with time.
                                                                                                                                                                               -Kriti Malhotra
                                                     

Thursday, August 24, 2017

A Drive Through Madness



What happens to a bird that has been nestled and nurtured, who finally gets noticed?

This is the greatest story of my life. I, Reily Cameron, make a confession to never to fall in love again.

It all started from a party in the month of October, a mere party with music and the dense night. Had there not been an exchange of glances, had there not been an exchange of promises, had there not been a moment of notice, I would have been a freer bird.

As an aftermath of that party, Ander Cruise and I become the greatest friends or maybe something more than that. We talked over the phone for long hours, we debated, we fought over trivial issues, he revenged the hurts that I would inflict on him and it never could be the same.

I would wake up during the nights thinking about him, I would not eat anything, I kept growing weaker and weaker and yes, he was all over me: the breath that I would breathe.
Nothing lasts forever, does it?

Ander was going to another country the next year in September and I was to stay back in the same country though in a different city. We knew that we would be separated one or the other day but we were too immature to handle ourselves.

There was Skype, there were unbelievably high telephone bills, there were low grades, there were struggles for independence, there were struggles for freedom but nothing could work on us. We were still we.

It was the month of December: a cold December until my warmth returned .I was a dither and anticipative. I remember how I jumped at the telephone: once, twice many times just to check whether he had returned or not. He was there. I heard him.

‘Hi’, said I, confident on the face yet anxious underneath.

‘Hi’
‘Are you feeling well? You must be feeling so strange. I remember when I had returned from Darjeeling to my city: it was a drastic change. Everything seemed smaller than what I had been used to for a while. Is that how you are feeling? Ander? Why are you so quiet?’

‘I feel strange.’

‘I know: you will take some time.’

We decided to meet in the evening, an evening that I can never forget. It was dusk. I went outside the lane and stood there waiting for him to arrive. I kept getting more and more restless as there was nobody around. He finally came in his grey car.

‘Hi’, I looked at him.

He extended his hand towards me in a hand-shake and I took it. He was still the same: I was relieved. His face looked the same, a tanned complexion with dark and penetrating eyes, dark hair falling over his forehead and then his hands; they were still large and accommodating and his self was still angry yet beautiful.

We went for a short drive because he had commitments back his home.

We were the most disciplined that day. We were formal and kept a lot of distance from each other.

The next day we went for a longer drive in the evening. We went to the countryside from the city for some time in silence and with each other. There was a long clean road, stretching up to the horizon; there were long stretches of green fields with trees on either sides and then there was a little lake. The Sun shone on its surface and made it alive with exuberance. I was with him, he was with me. We decided to stop and sit by the lake side.

We sat next to each other, close to each other. Passers-by noticed us but we kept sitting there in silence.

‘Do you want me to click your picture?’

‘Okay’

We clicked our pictures: together, separately, together with the sunshine and as it started getting darker we drove away.

On the way as we kept talking about our whereabouts, he said,
‘Hey, are we in a relationship?’

‘Of course we are. We fight, we pretend, we pretend but deep down we are always in a relationship.’
He took my hand in his. They were warm and comfortable. He seemed to get uneasy. His eyes were lustrous. He was unsure about whatever he was doing. He kept saying that he was not feeling well. He stopped the on the roadside.

I was confused. I think I saw him shivering. He held my hand, he held my face and kissed on my cheek gently, he put his head down on my lap: I started caressing his face; he took my hand to his lips and then my palms and then my hand again and kissed me there too. I kept asking him if he was fine. He was not able to articulate much; I was confused.

He resumed driving. We reached my home.
‘Ander, I am leaving now. Tell me what is wrong with you? ,’ I said about to open the door of the car.
He took my waist in his hands and started kissing me on my lips. I was taken aback and jerked back but soon, I was kissing him as well. We kept kissing each other as long as we could.

I took his precious face in both my hands and kissed him again and again.
It was peaceful, safe and comfortable.

My phone rang up and I had to go.

I did not know what to think when I was out of the car. I was smiling, my face was flushed and I was smiling again. I felt like a little criminal yet I was happy.

We met everyday regularly after that once. We would only kiss, snuggle and hug each other. I had fallen into him; I had fallen into love.

We kissed goodbye to each other on the last day we had met. I flew back to Darjeeling. When we talked over the phone now, he seemed very distant to me. We had not talked to each other much in the next few days until I got a call from him just to tell me: ‘Reily, I cannot come to meet you at Darjeeling’.

After the light, had come the dark. The last day on which we met was the day when his family confessed their disapproval of our relationship to him in private: ‘It will not be able to last longer’, had said his mother to him.

Who is next from the nest?


Monday, August 14, 2017

A Gift to Facebook: Interesting Status’

Did you know that air also has Facebook? Facebook has become as necessary for our lives as air. Considering this and a lot of other reasons such as letting people connect and a source of news, a little gift seemed pretty natural for me to give.
Here are some ways in which a status can be made interesting:-

An Instance: Write about a little instance that happened around you such as bits of conversation or a little uncanny instance.

Quotes, quotes, quotes:  Your grandmother said something worthwhile, share it. You read something somewhere that caught your attention, put it there.

A song on a loop?: Have those two lines have been stuck in your head since morning? Get them out of your system. (Smiles!)

‘Make a difference’: If you want to make a difference, go for it and tell the world what you would like to change. One of my professors always said that sensitization is a good thing. I hope she reads this and smiles. Oh! I have already dropped a hint.

Tweak! Tweak!: Your pets are happening and would not mind you showing them off to the world. Feel proud of them.

This blog post is my Facebook status and off I go now.

                                                                                                  -Kriti Malhotra


Friday, July 28, 2017

Clothes are to be Loved

I have been accused of having too many clothes!  My answer: I have had an innate love for clothes since childhood (maybe since birth; mom would know!) When I was still a child, I would put on my new clothes the moment they were out of the packet. Hell would break loose in the house as I would decide what to wear. My entire wardrobe would be sprawling on the floor in the room till I would choose the most befitting one. Along with that, would be the worry of having matching accessories, hairstyle and oh! shoes.  My wardrobe would be my most well-kept thing. My friends would look at it during get-togethers.

Be assured, the passion still remains except that it has been replaced by compassion. It hurts me to watch my clothes kept in an untidy way or thrown somewhere. Unless, I gift some clothes to someone, they’re my possessions. However, the frenzy of childhood has mellowed down. I have become quicker (perhaps more efficient) in choosing an attire for an occasion. 

I may be considered to be a materialist by some. In my defense, I can only say that I value how much thought and effort (somebody’s passion) is involved in making a piece of clothing. Each piece of clothing represents some ideals, some creativity and gallons of love. Therefore, though they may fall under the category of inanimate things, I treat them with a lot of love. Why not? They help me represent my personality! Believe me, I have tried to shirk off from them but it has never really worked. Besides, there are other benefits of having too many clothes such as availability of clothes for all kinds of occasions, fun while taking pictures and a lack of worry thereof.

Thank you to all the people and legacies who have helped me build my wardrobe!

P.S. A special note of gratitude to Coco Chanel for changing the face of western fashion world for women.


Wednesday, July 19, 2017

“You don’t deserve me”

                                                           
Let me start from the start. Recently, I turned down the proposal of a man (I wonder if he ‘deserves’ to be called one!) He sent me long messages berating me and telling me that I did not deserve someone like him. Perhaps, it was his way of taking revenge for his hurt; his defense mechanism to console himself. Later, I was standing under the shower (which is a good place) and had a stream of thoughts.

We often tell our friends: “You deserve someone better;” we often tell ourselves: “I do not deserve this.” There are quotes scribbled everywhere that tell us : “You deserve so much more” and the most ground-shaking one: “You only get what you think you deserve.” (It seems a cop is standing at my head and glaring at me).In the book, Only Love is Real  by Dr.Brain Weiss, the author points out how we deserve all the blessings that we have.  We have a strange sense of entitlement. In fact, the society is entrenched with this sense of entitlement. My remuneration ended there.

So, why do we think we deserve anything or anybody at all?

I will be considering this question in two areas predominantly.

Many people reject other people without even knowing them. Sometimes, it is due to a superiority complex and sometimes because the person is “out of my league.” How can we say, especially, at the end of the relationship that we deserve a better friend or partner? This does not work because:

 We have certain opinions about ourselves and form opinions about others. The judgments about the other person are completely subjective. It all depends on the environment we have been in and the experiences that we have had. For instance, my normal stress level might be ‘too stressful’ according to you. It is a possibility that there was a friction in the relationship or the ideals did not match or we disapprove of someone’s behavior but we cannot deserve someone better just because we are two different people who have different aims, different priorities and a different worldview.  

People change over time. People are continuously growing and learning different ways of thinking and behaving.  We can choose to bid goodbye to a relationship due to some reasons but not because we deserve someone better.

And now the second portion:

We often think that we deserve more than what we have. We deserve what the other person has. Maybe we do not really deserve what the other person does not have. Maybe it is time that we start thanking life for whatever we do have because many people do not even have that. Did you deserve to be blessed with mental alacrity? Did that person deserve to be born to a humble household?

The idea of ‘deserving’ something or someone is just one of the bubbles we have created around ourselves. If we learn to burst the bubble, we might be able to see clearly what we really are bestowed with and why we are not entitled to anything or anyone at all.

 I certainly cannot decide whether that man ‘deserves’ to be called a ‘man’ at all.
                                                                                                                                                              -Kriti Malhotra


Friday, May 12, 2017

Ana Needs a New Love

Ana threw the bouquet of roses into the green dust-bin sitting at the pavement. She knew that nobody would notice her kicking it in the coal darkness of the night but just stomped away.

As soon as she reached her apartment, she called up Nina.

“Nina, I broke up with William.”

“What? Why” Nina said loudly in her shrill voice.

“I felt empty with him. He did not complete me. I just realized that. I tried to make him understand but he just got angrier and angrier. He said I played with him. I initiated the break up because I did not want to play with him. I wanted him to know the truth.”

“Ana, Ana, Ana.”

“Yes?”

“You did the right thing, just listen to some music and rest.”

Ana wore her favorite pyjamas with the dandelions on them, a strapped black blouse and sat in her couch sulking. She looked beautiful as the moonlight fell on her dark and lustrous eyes; her olive oil colored skin; and dark long hair. She did not want to feel guilty yet that familiar feeling slowly crept through her stomach like the territories of a river that it divides into at its mouth.

Ana tried hard not to feel uptight the next week and the next. She tried to concentrate on her job; she joined singing classes to learn something different; she tried to make new dishes but the guilt would not abandon her.

One evening, while she was in the kitchen and making cake popsicles, her phone rang. She brightened up as it was Nina. She wiped her hand on her green apron and heard it.

“Hi Ana, I have good news for you.”

“What is it?”

“There is a guy…”

“You need to stop there Nina.” And Ana hung up.

William had been enough of a disappointment for Ana. His last words to her:“Nobody will ever be able to fulfill you” were stinging at her. She put the spatula away; covered her face with her hands and sat on the stool. She felt bitterly lonely. The life of distractions she was building for herself was not helping her at all.

She took out the phone from the pocket of her jeans and called Nina back.

“Who is this guy?”

“That is my girl, Ana. I love you. I met him in my office. His name is Joe.He has just joined as the manager. He is tall with broad shoulders and hazel eyes. He is very organized and goal-oriented. All women die for him. I think you will like him. Meet him once, will you?”

“Alright. Please arrange for a meeting.”

“See you in the evening?”

“Sure.”

After days, Ana finally smiled. She was looking forward to unchain the fetters of emptiness that tied her. She wanted to break free and here was another chance.

She wore a black short dress to meet Joe and Nina. Ana was stuck by his mannerism and speech. She enjoyed being with him throughout the evening. There were times when his gaze met hers and he would wink and smile at her. Nina left early leaving the two of them by themselves.

Ana and Joe decided to walk by the lake together. It was getting darker. Ana smiled at him and Joe looked at her amused.

“So, what do you want from me? A cure for your loneliness? An escape from your self-hatred?”

Ana looked at him aghast.

“How can say that to me?”
“Well! I am a reader of characters and you interest me keenly.”

Having heard these words from the mouth of a man she had barely known, she felt her anger rising. She walked away and decided to never speak to him again.

Ritually, as soon as she reached home, she rang up Nina. However, she got no response.

“An escape from my self-hatred; was that all? Do I hate myself?”
She lay down thinking on her bed for some time. Tears welled up from the corners of her eyes. Had she been living her entire life wearing a garb of deception? She cried a little more.

She walked up to her wardrobe took out a blue coffee mug. It reminded her of her little brother whom she had seen fall off the balcony. She was twelve. She had shouted for help frantically but nothing could have been done. She had blamed herself for it since then. It was true, she thought that she loathed herself. But was it justice to herself to have borne the burden of it even sixteen years later?


                                                                  -Kriti Malhotra